thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
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