god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
