Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Randomize
