I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
