I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
