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I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD