grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
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