I need help removing her.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
