I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize