as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Randomize
