The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
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