His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
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