Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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