No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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