i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Randomize
