HIV tests are more positive than that guy
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
