I need help removing her.
one might say we're banned from that church
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
