He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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