batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Randomize
