he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Randomize
