Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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