you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
