Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Will you blow on my dice?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): Will you blow on my dice? http://tfl.nu/qi0r
  Replies (3) Good night (1342) Bad night (673)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do http://tfl.nu/ke2v
  Replies (19) Good night (5124) Bad night (1480)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette. http://tfl.nu/f90v
  Replies (77) Good night (4784) Bad night (1015)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back http://tfl.nu/xz4y
  Replies (15) Good night (1438) Bad night (4495)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know? http://tfl.nu/fcdy
  Replies (7) Good night (1174) Bad night (4069)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues. http://tfl.nu/ej4i
  Replies (5) Good night (2941) Bad night (1210)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy http://tfl.nu/5ech
  Replies (17) Good night (1012) Bad night (6002)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe. http://tfl.nu/wokx
  Replies (2) Good night (1377) Bad night (675)
• Favorite

  (435): View more from Utah

  For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (435): For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job http://tfl.nu/nykr
  Replies (7) Good night (2269) Bad night (657)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand http://tfl.nu/1hp7
  Replies (1) Good night (1631) Bad night (549)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Was I asleep on the ride home?

  (1-512): View more from Texas

  Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Was I asleep on the ride home? (1-512): Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face. http://tfl.nu/zq2f
  Replies (4) Good night (799) Bad night (530)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them.. http://tfl.nu/tn7r
  Replies (0) Good night (718) Bad night (445)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (563): A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night. http://tfl.nu/qzkz
  Replies (4) Good night (423) Bad night (563)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed? http://tfl.nu/h0fu
  Replies (8) Good night (758) Bad night (307)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns. http://tfl.nu/r79e
  Replies (2) Good night (1032) Bad night (279)

Randomize