Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(804): View more from Virginia

ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"

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(706): View more from Georgia

I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.

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(231): View more from Michigan

You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop

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19 Parents Admit the Lies They’ve Told Their Children
Read it at the TFLN blog
(606): View more from Kentucky

If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.

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(410): View more from Maryland

It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.

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(323): View more from California

I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?

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(908): View more from New Jersey

She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE

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(217): View more from Illinois

I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else

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