I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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