so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
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