Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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