Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
