i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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