she woke up with a sticky ear
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.