I want to have your abortion
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
