i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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