i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Small penises have feelings too.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
