She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
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