Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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