No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
