i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
