I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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