just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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