Cold hands, warm shart.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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