He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize