Pappa wants mamma naked
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
