Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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