i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
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