Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
