i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
