bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
