Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
