Whod you bang
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
