I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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