walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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