Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Two words: blizzard sex
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
