is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
