He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
